Some things in life cannot be fixed. And if something in your life has blown up, the last thing you want is someone trying to cheer you up or tell you that everything is going to be okay.
Today’s discussion is about dealing with the raw pain and emotion of things not working out as planned. It’s about telling the truth and not trying to sugar coat everything. Because life doesn’t always happen in a straight line and we need a way to get and give support when bad things happen.
“For most things in life, we don’t need solutions, we need to be heard.” – Megan Devine
Highlights of This Episode:
- Megan shares the personal story of her most devastating experience.
- How do we live with the things that can never be fixed?
- Our culture glosses over the things that hurt because we don’t know how to talk about it.
- Acknowledgement is what’s most needed when someone is in pain.
- A concrete offer of assistance is the best thing you can do for someone experiencing pain or loss.
- Why being awkward is far better than staying in silence or trying to be polite.
- Never make assumptions about what might be helpful to someone that’s grieving.
- If we don’t talk about life’s messy situations, we wont get better at it.
- How to practice showing up for ourselves and each other with skill and grace.
- When things are hard, we need space to be with things that hurt.
- The beauty of offering someone companionship in the truth of their own life.
Insights from Megan:
What’s one word that best describes how you work?
What are you currently reading?
- Books on how to build a wood-fired brick oven in the back yard.
What everyday thing are you better at than anyone else?
- Being me!
What idea or belief do very few people agree with you on?
- The idea that when you tell the truth about something that hurts, you’re not being negative.
What’s the best business advice that you’ve ever received?
- If it feels gross to you, don’t do it. And when creating things, ask yourself “for what purpose?” or “to bless whom?”
Links and Resources Mentioned in This Episode:
- Refuge In Grief
- It’s Okay That You’re Not OK: Meeting Grief and Loss in a Culture That Doesn’t Understand (Pre-Order it here)
- Writing Your Grief
- Kate McCombs – Sex Education + Relationship Communication
- Connect with Megan on Twitter and Facebook
About Megan Devine:
Teacher, speaker, and psychotherapist, Megan Devine, has been stirring up our culture’s ideas around grief and loss since 2009. Megan is known for her practical, no-nonsense approach to grief, and for her ability to guide people inside some of the most devastating experiences of life and love. She’s an outspoken advocate of emotional intelligence, and the skills needed to love each other better – no matter what life brings.
“Pain is everywhere and we need to get better at dealing with it without diminishing it.”
– Megan Devine